Another Surgery

Looks kind of like a stuffed poblano pepper at El Chico's, doesn't it? Well,...it's a gall bladder full of stones. Yesterday, I had this removed from my body. This isn't mine,...however it could have been. They punched 5 holes in me and took it out around 1PM,....then I went home about 6PM. This is amazing and near miraculous. Anytime you can opt for minimally invasive surgery,....do it! I am in a little pain,....however not significant,....and have hydracodone to assist me with that. Some of my friends who had the same surgery said that they actually enjoyed the surgery. Though that seems an extreme exaggeration,....I could honestly say that it was enjoyable compared to my appendectomy; a walk in the park in comparison.

I registered in the lobby(like checking into a fine hotel), paid my portion of the surgery,...10% of about $5K,....which I could say was the most painful part of the whole deal,...but getting the IV started was $500 stressful to me,...ironically the burning pain medication they shoot you with to numb the spot where they start the IV is the largest source of the pain in that process.

Once they got my IV started they gave me something that felt like about three martinis and I got fuzzy and drifted off. I had to wait for my surgical time slot to roll around. I guess things were backed up because my original 11:15 spot,....turned into a 1:15 start time. The surgical holding room was crowded with about five beds on each wall with 3 feet between them, all the surgical holding nurses, all of the anesthesiologist and CRNA's and surgeons, all of the surgical nurses,....I thought a medical version of waiting in line to ride the Titan at Six Flags. Some folks would get there after me and then be whisked away to their appointment with the knife,....unlike Six Flags, I wasn't too upset that they cut line. The nurse told me it was even more crowded in the early morning.

I had a nice sunset scene gel covering the florescent light panel above me. The nurse I had was very conversational, which was better than laying there in silence conjuring up worst case scenarios. I guess that's why they gave me the nice cocktail before to allow me to sleep.

Then the time came and three Anesthesia guys came in and two surgical nurses wheeled me down to the OR. It was freezing cold in there,....it looked like every OR you have seen in the movies or on TV. They put an oxygen mask on me,....and then I remember waking up in recovery,....not really wanting to, cause the sleep was so good. The first two questions I asked were, did they complete the surgery with a scope(minimally invasive) or did they have to cut me,....thank goodness it was the scope! Then the other question I asked was did they have to catheter me. Again, the answer I wanted,...NO CATHETER! I was hungry,...I was sitting in a reclining chair,....which I barely remember crawling into with my groggy self. They had a small TV I could bring close enough to be in my face. I had a sumptuous meal of water, Shasta cola(where'd they dig that up?)a regular saltine and a graham cracker. The big moment they were waiting for in order to release me was for me to pee. I thought it would be a piece of cake,...I felt the urge,..however was unable to produce the first two times,....we walked for a little while and I came back and peed ever so slightly and they asked if I wanted to go home. Again, a response I was longing to hear.

I feel fine, though I look like the victim of a drive by, with five, taped up, bloody holes in my gut. I got my drugs,...I can doze as I wish today and recover in peace, so I can go to work Monday.